كما أطعمته هو عند الصغر، أطعمها هو عند الكبر – (رَّبِّ ارْحَمْهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيَانِي صَغِيرًا) - سورة الإسراء As she fed him when he was young, he fed her when she got old.. "My Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up [when I was] small." - 17:24
Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) said: “Anybody who believes in Allah and the Last Day should not harm his neighbor, and anybody who believes in Allah and the Last Day should entertain his guest generously, and anybody who believes in Allah and the Last Day should talk what is good or keep quiet.” [Sahih Bukhari]
The only thing that allows a person to behave morally, when there is no one to notice any lapses, is the belief that Allah (subhana wa ta’ala) is always watching and that each moment of our existence will be either a source of reward or punishment for us on the Day of Judgement. Those who believe this are told by the Prophet (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) to do three things:
1. Not harm their neighbours. 2. Entertain their guests generously. 3. Abstain from useless, immoral and every kind of sinful speech.
It has become somewhat of a trend to view guests as burdens, when the fact of the matter is that they are providing us with additional opportunities of earning Jannat. Regardless of who they are, Allah (subhana wa ta’ala) will reward us for what we spend on them of time, effort and material resources.
Regarding the duties of hosts, Rasul Allah (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) advised us to provide guests with food of a higher quality than what we normally eat ourselves, on the first day. On the second and third day we may give the kind of food that we regularly consume. Beyond this, what we do for them counts as Sadaqa.
Whether we obey a Fard (obligatory) command or a Sunnah/Nafl (voluntary) one, we are rewarded for it by Allah (subhana wa ta’ala), though the reward for fulfilling a Fard is greater.
Islam pays attention to the issue of neighbours, whether they are Muslim or not, because of the interests served by that in making the nation like one body.
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: ‘Jibreel kept on enjoining the good treatment of neighbours to the extent that I thought that he would include neighbours as heirs.”
(Agreed upon. Narrated by Muslim, 2625)
Among the rights of one neighbour over another as affirmed by Islam are the initiation of greetings, visiting him if he is sick, offering condolences if calamity befalls him, congratulating him at times of joy, overlooking his mistakes, concealing his faults, bearing his annoyance with patience, giving him gifts, lending him money if he needs it, lowering one’s gaze from looking at his womenfolk, and guiding him to that which will benefit him in his religious and worldly affairs.
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
“The best of companions with Allaah is the one who is best to his companion, and the best of neighbours with Him is the one who is best to his neighbour.”
(Narrated by al-Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 115)
Concerning neighbours’ rights, Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Worship Allaah and join none with Him (in worship); and do good to parents, kinsfolk, orphans, Al-Masaakeen (the poor), the neighbour who is near of kin, the neighbour who is a stranger, the companion by your side…”[al-Nisaa’ 4:36]
Islam warns against annoying one’s neighbours or treating them badly.
The Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) explained that this would lead to being deprived of Paradise:
“He will not enter Paradise from whose harm his neighbour is not safe.”
Jubair ibn Mut’im reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “The one who cuts off will not enter Paradise.” Ibn Umar said that Sufyan explained, “It means one who cuts off family ties.”
►To clean up the virus of your memory card , you have to take it somewhere and delete it. ►To clean Up the mud and dust from your body , you have to go and take a bath. ►To clean up your vehicles, you have to take it to a service shop and wash it. BUt, ►To clean up Your heart from Sins (no matter how big it is no matter where You are) , you just need to repent truly to Allah to forgive your sins. Indeed it is the greatest Favour. Alhamdulillah :))
Jaber (ra) relates that the Messenger of God (pbuh) said, "Avoid injustice; injustice is darkness on the Day of Judgement. Avoid stinginess; stinginess has led those befor you to perdition: it caused them to shed the blood of each other and to take as lawful that which is unlawful to them." (Muslim).
Why do Muslims slaughter the animal in a ruthless manner by torturing it and slowly and painfully killing it?
The Islamic method of slaughtering animals, known as Zabiha has been the object of much criticism from a large number of people.
Before I reply to the question, let me relate an incidence about a discussion between a Sikh and a Muslim regarding animal slaughter.
Once a Sikh asked a Muslim, “Why do you slaughter the animal painfully by cutting the throat instead of the way we do with one stroke i.e. jhatka?” The Muslim replied “We are brave and courageous and attack from the front. We are mard ka baccha (macho men), you are cowards and attack from behind”.
Jokes apart, one may consider the following points, which prove that the Zabiha method is not only humane but also scientifically the best:
1. Islamic method of slaughtering animal
Zakkaytum is a verb derived from the root word Zakaah (to purify). Its infinitive is Tazkiyah which means purification. The Islamic mode of slaughtering an animal requires the following conditions to be met:
a. Animal should be slaughtered with a sharp object (knife)
The animal has to be slaughtered with a sharp object (knife) and in a fast way so that the pain of slaughter is minimised.
b. Cut wind pipe, throat and vessels of neck
Zabiha is an Arabic word which means ‘slaughtered’. The ‘slaughtering’ is to be done by cutting the throat, windpipe and the blood vessels in the neck causing the animal’s death without cutting the spinal cord.
c. Blood should be drained
The blood has to be drained completely before the head is removed. The purpose is to drain out most of the blood which would serve as a good culture medium for micro-organisms. The spinal cord must not be cut because the nerve fibres to the heart could be damaged during the process causing cardiac arrest, stagnating the blood in the blood vessels.
2. Blood is a good medium for germs and bacteria Blood is a good media of germs, bacteria, toxins, etc. Therefore the Muslim way of slaughtering is more hygienic as most of the blood containing germs, bacteria, toxins, etc. that are the cause of several diseases is eliminated.
3. Meat remains fresh for a longer time Meat slaughtered by Islamic way remains fresh for a longer time due to deficiency of blood in the meat as compared to other methods of slaughtering.
4. Animal does not feel pain The swift cutting of vessels of the neck disconnects the flow of blood to the nerve of the brain responsible for pain. Thus the animal does not feel pain. While dying, the animal struggles, writhes, shakes and kicks, not due to pain, but due to the contraction and relaxation of the muscles deficient in blood and due to the flow of blood out of the body.
Dr Zakir Naik, by virtue of his compelling and logical call to the truth, has a huge fan following - not only among Muslims, but people of various faiths world over, who shall readily stand up for the truth.
HOW TO COME OVER A PORN ADDICTION IN ISLAMIC AND SCIENTIFIC WAY:
Time to Kick Porn Addiction Out of your System: • Physiology of porn addiction & why it's so hard to quit • Porn addicts: you are not losers & you CAN quit • The Ramadan connection • Simple changes towards a new life Some of you may be thinking, “Astaghfirullah, how can someone even think of doing this “.First say alḥamdulillāh, and thank Allāh that He, Al-Rahman, has protected you from this great fitnah. Next pray to Allāh that He keeps you away from the dark forces of sexual addictions of all types, from porn to zina, naudhubillah.
Effects of Porn Although destructive in many ways, the deteriorating impact porn addiction has on intimacy between spouses, tops the list. There is developing research that “pornography was progressively desensitizing these men sexually… that they quickly required higher levels of stimulation to achieve the same level of arousal”. The sad reality is that your wife/husband becomes progressively insufficient to satisfy your sexual desires. For those addiction-afflicted as well as those who aren't, take heed of the dangers of porn addiction. Like alcohol and drug addiction, porn addiction cannot simply be shut off. Rather, one must undergo a rigorous process requiring time and effort, and this process cannot start unless one understands why this addiction is so strong. Porn addiction is one sub-category of sexual addictions, likely the lightest in terms of haram- but equally destructive and almost certainly leading to worse if not nipped in the bud. That is why Allāh has instructed us to not even “approach zina” [Quran 17.32], because with porn as an entry-way, it becomes almost impossible to stop one's path to zina.
Why is it an Addiction? Research has shown that porn addiction is a “chemical addiction“, having an effect on the brain that is very similar to drugs. It has even been called the new crack cocaine in this Wired article. Mary Anne Layden, co-director of the Sexual Trauma and Psychopathology Program at the University of Pennsylvania's Center for Cognitive Therapy, calls porn the “most concerning thing to psychological health that I know of existing today.” First let's see how drugs work so we may see how analogous it is to porn addiction. The National Institute of Drug Abuse reports: “Most drugs of abuse directly or indirectly target the brain's reward system by flooding the circuit with dopamine. Dopamine is a neurotransmitter present in regions of the brain that regulate movement, emotion, cognition, motivation, and feelings of pleasure. The overstimulation of this system, which rewards our natural behaviors, produces the euphoric effects sought by people who abuse drugs and teaches them to repeat the behavior.” Porn addiction works similarly: “During the sexual process, the brain begins narrowing its focus as it releases a tidal wave of endorphins and other neurochemicals like dopamine, norepinephrine, oxytocin and serotonin. These “natural drugs” produce a tremendous rush or high. When these chemicals are released during healthy marital intimacy we refer to them as “the fabulous four” because of the myriad positive benefits they generate between a husband and wife. When they are released during pornography use and other sexual addiction behaviors, we call them “the fearsome four” due to the severe addiction and many negative consequences they produce in the brain and nervous system.” [Read more in this informative article]
Overcoming Addiction We know that drug addicts can get over their addiction. We know that alcoholics have been able to do the same. So, if you are a porn addict, know this: (1) you are not alone (2) you are not a loser or an evil person (3) you CAN kick this habit but only with a huge amount of jihad'l-nafs (the struggle of the soul).
For spouses, family, friends, and supporters, know that: (1) It is important that you “recognize” the addiction and become partners towards a cure rather than continually debasing and disparaging the addict. Debasement only makes the addict feel worse and increases the desire to seek pleasure from endorphins through porn. (2) Porn addiction is destructive not only for the addict, but also for the spouse. As we saw in my previous post on porn addiction, it has the ability to destroy marriages. That is why it is not to be taken lightly. I urge spouses of addicts to please also be a “partner in solution” rather than a police officer. You cannot hammer the addiction out of your spouse. Learn about its physiological and psychological aspects, and HELP in the recovery. If you love your spouse, you will give it your very best shot.
The Ramadan Connection
The psychologist linked above, Joe Zychik, mentions two requirements for overcoming sexual addictions– effective motivation and a reliable method. Ramadan is a time where we are instructed to fast. Fasting has been described by the Prophet (salallahu 'alayhi wa sallam) as one of the ways to control sexual desire:
Abdullah (b. Mas'ud) (Allāh be pleased with him) reported that Allāh's Messenger (may peace be upon him) said to us: “O young men, those among you who can support a wife should marry, for it restrains eyes (from casting evil glances) and preserves one from immorality; but he who cannot afford it should observe fast for it is a means of controlling the sexual desire.”
During regular days, it may be tough to observe this instruction, but Ramadan is a month where you are surrounded with “effective motivation” to fast. The last thing you want to do is go through the motions of fasting yet breaking it by engaging in your addiction. Use this opportunity to make some strong moves towards a “reliable method“.
Connect with a close friend, family member, or spouse–someone you can trust. Let's call this person your “partner”. Have your partner install a strong porn filter/activity monitor on your computer. Let him/her control the password and make this partner promise that they will not give it to you regardless of how much you ask for it. If it helps, make them swear by Allāh. In some cultures, putting your hand on the Quran reinforces this promise.
Make Structural Changes
Replace your SmartPhone- If you watch porn on your phone, get rid of it! Replace it with a non-internet-capable “cheap mobile”. Either you can have a nice toy or you can save yourself from porn. Change your computer- If you watch it on your laptop, consider buying a desktop instead that stays in an open area where you wouldn't want to be caught watching porn. Turn off your TV- if u have any porn videos or DVDs, destroy them now, before you lose your spirit.
Self-Talk- Talk to yourself and your partner about your addiction. Consider this: If you are able to control yourself during fasting, why can't you control yourself during the nights of Ramadan, nights that are the holiest nights of the entire year? And if you are able to control yourself for the entire Ramadan, is the Allāh of Ramadan not the same Allāh of the rest of the months, Who watches your every move?
Make constant dua- Ask Him, Al-Tawwab, to pardon your sins, and grant you barakah in your efforts and time to help you overcome this trial. Recognize that you are in this trial only by the will of Allāh (subḥānahu wa ta'āla), and by His will and mercy, He will lift you from this trial after you rise from it, a stronger believer. Use the nights of this most blessed months, and the moments before you break your fast to humbly ask Allāh (subḥānahu wa ta'āla) for help.
Moisten your tongue with duas such as this one: اللهم اني ظلمت نفسي ظلما كثيرا ولا يغفر الذنوب الا انت فاغفرلي مغفرة من عندك, وارحمني انك انت الغفور الرحيم 'Alla-humma innee thalamtu nafsee thulman kathee-ra wala yaghfiru thunouba ila anta, faghfirlee maghfiratan min 'indika, warr hamnee innaka antal Ghafoor-ur Raheem.' [O Allāh! I have wronged myself very much, and none can forgive sins, except You only. Grant me forgiveness, and have mercy upon me; indeed You are the Most Forgiving, Ever Merciful.] (Bukhāri)
Read Self Help Books- Beyond the self-talk, you need to continue the journey on a “reliable method”. Your best bet is to get books on breaking sex addiction. Do it NOW before you lose your motivation to read them! It is more important for you to read these books in Ramadan than to spend time on entertaining guests or even tarawih (stopping haram is more important than an optional, mustahab).
Get Counseling- If you have access and ability to engage with a psychologist, this is the time to put that in motion. Call one and set up an appointment. Make sure this psychologist is a specialist in the area of addictions, especially sex addiction. In other words, start doing whatever it takes during these Ramadan days of high spiritual motivation to set into motion something that will keep you porn free in the LONG RUN, as opposed to perhaps controlling it only in Ramadan.