الجمعة، 2 مايو 2014

decreed

“And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them ''Uff" a word of disrespect, nor shout at them but address them in terms of honour. And lower unto them the wing of submission and humility through mercy, and say: ‘My Lord! Bestow on them Your Mercy as they did bring me up when I was small.’”_Qur’an 17:23-24

“And We have enjoined on man (to be dutiful and good) to his parents. His mother bore him in weakness and hardship upon weakness and hardship, and his weaning is in two years give thanks to Me (The Creator) and to your parents, unto Me (The Creator) is the final destination.”_Qur’an 31:14

Prophet Muhammad [pbuh] reinforced the duty to be kind to parents. A companion of the Prophet [pbuh] once asked him which of the many good deeds a man can do is the most loved by God (The Creator). Prophet Muhammad [pbuh] answered him by saying, “To offer the prayer in its proper time”. The companion then asked, “And what is next?” to which Prophet Muhammad [pbuh] replied, “To be good and dutiful to your parents…”_ Saheeh Al-Bukhari

The responsibility to be kind and good to parents comes right after the greatest duty in Submission to the Creator alone in peace (‘Islam’), the prayer.

The Arabic word that is used in the Quran and the narrations of Prophet Muhammad to denote this kindness to parents as bir, and more often than not, it is translated as goodness. However, as is the case with most Arabic words, a direct translation into English often fails to explain the true depth of meaning. Bir does not only mean goodness; it contains shades of meaning that indicate kindness, compassion, respect and even patience. The Submission to the Creator alone in peace (‘Islam’), the way of life, encompasses all these qualities, and the submitters to the Creator alone in peace (‘Muslims’) must strive to model this behaviour in all dealings, particularly in the relationship between parents and children.

Parents care for and nurture their children their entire lives, but at one point this duty reverses, parents become old and feeble and in need of this care and nurturing themselves. The child is obligated to care for the parents by displaying all the qualities of bir and knowing that the reward for this is with God (The Creator). The Prophet Muhammad [pbuh] said, “If anyone possesses these three characteristics God (The Creator) will give him an easy death and bring him into His Paradise: gentleness towards the weak, affection towards parents”_ Tirmidhi

A Submitter to the Creator alone in peace (‘Muslim’) is obliged to show respect towards parents even if they are non-Muslim, and the greatest love he can show towards them is to supplicate to God (The Creator) in hope that they will be guided to the submission to the Creator alone in peace (‘Islam’). At the time of the Prophet, many of those who embraced the submission to the Creator alone in peace (‘Islam’) found that it conflicted with the beliefs and requests of their parents, but they were taught to be kind and to obey their parents, except if the parents demanded they disobey God (The Creator).

“But if they (both) strive with you to make you join in worship with Me (The Creator) others that of which you have no knowledge, then obey them not, but behave with them in the world kindly, and follow the path of him who turns to Me (The Creator) in repentance and in obedience. Then to Me (The Creator) will be your return, and I shall tell you what you used to do.” (Quran 31:15)

Being dutiful to parents, obeying them and treating them with kindness is embedded in the teachings of the submission to the Creator alone in peace (‘Islam’), however obedience to God (The Creator) is always the first and foremost duty in the submission to the Creator alone in peace (‘Islam’).

In the time of Prophet Muhammad [pbuh], a man asked permission to go on a military expedition. The Prophet asked the man if he had a mother, when he replied yes, Prophet Muhammad said, “Stay with her because Paradise lies beneath her feet”. _(Ahmad, Al-Nasai)

A man came to the Prophet [pbuh] asking, ‘Who among the people is the most worthy of my good companionship? The Prophet [pbuh] said, your mother. The man said, ‘Then who?’ The Prophet [pbuh] said, then your mother. The man further asked, ‘Then who?’ The Prophet [pbuh] said, then your mother. The man asked again, ‘Then who?’ The Prophet [pbuh] replied, then your father._(Saheeh Al-Bukhari, Saheeh Muslim)

From only these two sayings of Prophet Muhammad, we are able to understand the importance of mothers in Islam. However, in these days of materialism it is easy to forget that God obligated us to honour our parents, especially our mothers. Sometimes we find ourselves uttering words of contempt or complaining about our parents. This sort of behaviour is not from the submission to the Creator alone in peace (‘Islam’).

God (The Creator) reminds us that Prophet John (known as the Baptist) was dutiful towards his parents both loving them and obeying them. He said:

“O John (Yahya)! Hold fast the Scripture. And We gave him wisdom even as a youth. And (made him) sympathetic to men as a mercy (or a grant) from Us, and purity: he was righteous. And dutiful towards his parents, and he was neither an arrogant nor disobedient (to the Creator or to his parents).”_Quran 19:12-14

Additionally, in the Qur'an (Recital), we are able to hear the words of Jesus; he describes himself by coupling his obedience to God with his duties towards his mother Maryam/Mary.

"He [Jesus] said: 'I am indeed a servant of God(The Creator). He has given me revelation and made me a prophet; He has made me blessed wheresoever I be; and He has enjoined on me prayer and charity as long as I live. He has made me kind to my mother, and not overbearing or miserable. _ Qur'an (19:32)

The Companions’ Behaviour

Abdullah ibn Omar, a leading scholar from among Prophet Muhammad’s companions once saw a man carrying his mother on his back and going around the Holy House in Mecca=Becca (its other name). He did not complain or show any signs of annoyance; rather he kept repeating a line of poetry comparing himself to a camel. He looked at Abdullah ibn Omar and asked him whether by so doing he discharged his debt to his mother. Ibn Omar said, “No. You have not even paid back one twinge of the pain she felt when giving birth to you”.

Another companion from the early days of the submission to the Creator alone in peace (‘Islam”), Dhibyan ibn Ali ath-Thowree also used to travel with his mother to Mecca=Becca {watch the video https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=462840997145772&set=a.308950145868192.66428.134560426640499&type=1&theater}. The journey was long and very hot; on the side of the road during their travels, he would dig a little pool and fill it with cool water. He would then turn to his mother and say, “Mother, sit in this water to cool yourself.”

A man came to Prophet Muhammad [pbuh] and said, “A young man is dying and people are asking him to say there is no god but God (The Creator), but he is unable to do so. “The Prophet then asked, "Did this man offer prayers?” The answer was yes. The Prophet then went to see the man and tried to encourage him to say there is no god but God(The Creator). Still he was unable to pronounce the words. Prophet Muhammad then called for the dying man’s mother. The mother he had persistently disobeyed.
When she appeared, the Prophet asked, 'Respected lady, is he your son?” She replied yes. He then asked, “O respected lady, if we threaten to throw your son into a raging fire, would you recommend him to be forgiven?” The lady replied that she would definitely ask him to be forgiven. The Prophet then said to her, “Then declare, making God (The Creator) and me your witnesses, that you are now pleased with him.” The old woman readily declared, "O God (The Creator), you and your Prophet are my witnesses that I am pleased with this beloved son of mine.” Then Prophet then turned to the dying man and asked him to recite, "There is no god but God (The Creator), He is the One and has no partners and I witness that Muhammad is His Servant and Messenger.” (At Tabarani, Ahmad)

Because of his mother’s forgiveness, the dying man was able to recite the words that, by the Grace and Mercy of God, may have allowed him to enter Paradise. The good treatment of parents can be the key to Paradise, on the other hand, bad behaviour towards them may result in a punishment in hellfire.

One of Prophet Muhammad’s companions asked about the deeds God loved most. The Prophet replied, the prayer offered on time and honouring parents... (Saheeh Bukhari)

The Prophet Muhammad [pbuh] said:

“When a person dies, all his deeds come to an end except three: ongoing charity, beneficial knowledge (which he has left behind), or a righteous child who will pray for him.” (At Tirmidhi)

A man from among the companions asked Prophet Muhammad [pbuh],

“Is there anything left from the goodness I owe my parents I should present to them after their death?” He replied, “Yes, four things: Pray and ask forgiveness for them. Fulfil their pledges. Be kind to their friends. And maintain the ties of kinship that come from only their direction”. (Ahmad, Abu Dawood &ibn Majah)

In the narrations of Prophet Muhammad [pbuh], we are able to observe the behaviour of Abdullah, the son of Omar ibn al Khattab. On the road to Mecca=Becca, Abdullah met a Bedouin. He greeted him with peace, had him ride the mount that he was riding and gave him the turban that he had been wearing on his head. One of Abdullah companions commented, “May God (The Creator) guide you, they are just bedouin and they are content with something simple.” Abdullah answered, “The father of this man was a close friend of my father, and I heard the Messenger of God say, “The best way of honouring one’s parents is for the son to keep in touch with his father’s friends.”

Submission to the Creator alone in peace (‘Islam’) recognizes the importance of the family unit, and a good and loving relationship between parents and children is essential. After God (The Creator), our parents deserve our gratitude and obedience. A Submitter to the Creator alone in peace (‘Muslim’) is obligated to show goodness and mercy to his or her parents. There is only one exception to this, if parents expect their children to associate anything with God (The Creator) or to do something regarded impermissible in Submission to the Creator alone in peace (‘Islam’), then the child must not obey, however nothing removes the obligation to be kind and respectful.

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 — مع ‏‎Hamid Pasha‎‏ و ‏‏7‏ آخرين‏.

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